Yours is on the dinner table...mine is in my underwear drawer.
IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
Well, I fucked her. But the sex wasn't all that great. Morning sex never is
Walked home this morning with my contacts in a shot glass.
First class.
you yelled that ur labia majora was swollen at 3 am in the dorm hallway
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
Explain to me how "cheap asian titties" is a complement?
We stopped midfuck cuz a guy was walking his dog. Who the fuck walks their dog in the dorm parking structure at 3am!?
I told her the party couldn't handle my playlist LAZERBAWLS and I was right. Cops in the basement, orgy in the kitchen, jousting in the living room.
Can rosie odonnell just not be a lesbian? Shes stressing me out, knowing we bat for the same team.
We are making a pool on how long he stays sober this time you want in?
Don't take advice from me. I'm simultaneously shitting and eating cheesecake.
I was just seen throwin up on the bookstore building near a trashcan by parents. Naturally I throw a thumbs up and say go college
i am risking my non lesbian vagina for your needs. i better be the best friend you ever had
It'd be good to change things up a bit, right now the only public service I'm doing from my apt is hanging out in my underwear with the lights on.
Randomize
