I cut holes in my blanket and put my arms through it. It's the sleeveless "Bro Edition" Snuggie.
Just did shots with my boss to warm up for our sales call to Childrens Hospital. I love startups.
There r osticjed everywhere
I wonder if i could put a dildo on my bike seat to encourage me to exercise.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I ever mention marriage force me to Brazil to do coke and strippers until I die.
I wonder if her husband knows I have my own drawer at the apartment
I ate 12 cupcakes in less than 24 hours, so no judgement here.
Will it be a clothes optional week when I get there? I have an amazing outfit of tattoos and toenail polish planned.
Remember that time I got suspended in eighth grade, well it was like that but I was on acid and wearing goggles
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
all i know is there's a picture on my phone of him wearing my purple sweatpants and licking the bottom of my foot.
Why did two squirrels just run out from behind the couch?
About that.
so he found out i have him as "average size" in my phone. fair to say we arnt going to be dating anymore
im gonna miss him. and by him, i mean his dick
Im glad your laughing because im currently convincing my penis you didnt mean it and its all gunna be ok.
I just found two ugly toothless rednecks fucking in the woods in my backyard. The man shouted at me close the door your letting the stank out which made no sense to me cuz we where outside. Whatever. just another Monday in the Northwoods.
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