I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
All the good ones are taken. All that's left is the Harry Potter geek or the asshole in the corner. I think I'll settle for Harry Potter.
no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
I sharted during my first quiz and I couldn't leave, I went ahead and took the rest of the day off.
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
Just convinced airport security that im sober. All i do is win.
Man, the last time I saw you you were giving me a thumbs up while being pulled out the bar by your belt from some girl.
if I die on the way please explain to my mother that I do not wear fishnets on a regular basis
After she cried and passed out at four in the morning, I had a very lovely, very drunken conversation with her mother while decorating a cake into the shape of a penis.
You kept saying you we're gonna puke and wanted to steal my pants
That does not explain the remnants of a small fire in my bathtub.
It's a "nonproductive" (vocab word) cough. It's like a constant tickle in my throat, like there's a little elf with feathers for feet going Gangnam style on my "uvula" (vocab word).
I'm hoping you were seen by someone holding a frozen turkey at 230 in the morning
On a scale from 1 to total dick, how inappropriate is it to pick your boyfriend up from rehab with a hangover?
I seriously feel like I just crawled out from under a shit covered rock. I'm NEVER drinking like that again...well, not for alteast a solid 3 hours.
Randomize
