are you going to last longer than 15 seconds
nope
just rolled a joint with wrapping paper.. and you say i have no christmas spirit
The only thing worse than cracking my rib on a slip and slide was having the doctors laugh when they found out in my medical history that I did this exact same thing last summer.
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
your dad made us margaritas and breakfast on the morning. I think it's safe to say he relives his glory days through us
It's also dangerous to ride a bike down the stairs after a few beers, but I've done it.
I saw he had me in his phone as "the fat twin"
I'm fighting fire with fire. When my parents interrogate me about what I was doing last night, I tell them the truth. Every disgusting, awkward detail. I'm 23 now and they need to get used to it.
Fine I'll cuddle you but only for the purpose of trying to survive
Dude... the time we have in life to be young and trivial is so incredibly short. I think we should drink tonight.
Fuck the walk of shame. I make this shit glorious.
The fact that you arent wearing shoes probably just adds to the classiness
Condom wrapper stuck to my shirt ups the anty
I don't really want to explain what i mean by this so just answer yes or no. are 5 cows enough?
you said it was a life or death situation, being your partner for beer pong doesn't count
Stop trying to get me to choose vodka over a nap
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
Randomize
