One girl and one boy is just not enough.
6 other girls and I took an ice cream truck to the bar when we couldn't get a cab. Best birthday ever.
Showering in my swimsuit in hopes of getting the beer smell out.
all im saying is that if he was a normal person, he would have fucked me by now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No. More. Tequila. Even the hot dog guy felt bad for me and you know that guy has seen some crazy shit.
Well, you know sobriety isn't something I like to do on the reg.
I have cobwebs on my vagina for halloween. And bats fly out when I open my legs.
Shit dude that sort of wholesale destruction can't just be done at the drop of a hat
If I was 5 years younger and single...
She STILL wouldn't fuck you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I tried to pay my tab and go home but she wrote me a "list of things I'm good at" with fellatio as no 1...
He simply fell in the fire, rolled out and continued to finish his bottle of vodka. Everyone else instantly sobered up just watching it.
I feel like a pet sloth would complement my lifestyle.
She looks like a hot George Washington...I'm going for it
Thanks for fingering me to orgasm during Wu-Tang Clan
Need a Dr's note to excuse me from blowjobs for 3-6 weeks while my jaw heals..
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