Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
No shame. Just smoked a bowl with a Norwegian. Feels like something to cross off a list.
Is it weird if I ask my drug dealer to prom? Be honest.
They're making scrambled eggs at 2 in the morning... with rum
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Tell him I thought his Superman stand on your bed and cum all over your back was quite funny
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
Also, the greatest of ironies: I got shampoo confiscated by security while Corey managed to get pot through. MERICA!
I've been on the toilet for an hour. On a six day bender. My ass feels like its leaking vodka
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She found the planted magnum condom..once she figured it out it was too late.
Cause I'll toss Tabasco sauce in his eyes and yell "Cobra attack" and walk away
Beer and xanax may be a bad combo, but I don't really care due to the beer and the xanax.
How do you clean human pee out of a carpet
Inconspicuously
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
Just imagine a dick squawking like a parrot
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