I feel like ignoring a facebook event is a lot like a pocket-veto. The only difference is instead of opposing legislation, I don't want to go to your sketchy party.
Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
i feel like i want to date him just so i could be besties with his penis
Can you still call it a wet dream if sandwiches were involved?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My favorite part about you getting arrested is having to explain the prosthetic leg in the front seat.
Please don't drown this weekend. It would be a shame to lose a dick like yours.
I don't know what it is about vodka that make me ruin relationships.
Some guy just rode an office chair down my street, I hope he comes back so I can give him my number.
I totally gave him head in sync to Beastie Boy's Sabotage playing in the background.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just so you know, your wedding is in the same place I gave my first bj.
Is it wrong i wouldn't sleep with him because his boxers said #1 dad all over them?
I think the best part was the fact that the stripper's lock screen was a picture of the virgin mary
He sent me a meme at 3am. Usually guys just send me booty calls that late. I think I'm in love
Apparently walking into a national conference and proclaiming "i'm here to fuck shit up" is frowned upon.
Who knew?
she prefaced telling me she was pregnant with "houston, we have a problem"
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