dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
i wonder if i could find a boyfriend who would call me big papa
sure if you go to prison
a pedometer??? no beatles?Steve jobs just took a dump in CA and it landed on my heart
Just walked pass a bum on the way to a coinstar... awkward
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
All I kmoe is rheres a coffee pot full pf vodka in my purse
This old guy just saw me toking on my bubbler before I go to the dentist. He gave me the nod.
Oh you know, watching its always sunny and petting his cat and NOT fucking. I'm starting my whorefree 2012 resolution early.
I feel like my chances would have been better if I hadn't told her "I need to fuck you before you leave."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We're like Siamese twins, but joined at the genitals.
I'm watching my cat lick a used condom wrapper on my nightstand and I'm too hungover to move and do anything about it. Tequila Tuesdays can not be a thing.
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
So far in 2016 I told someone id give them a blowjob for lasagna.
I swear I get as excited about the sound of a condom wrapper as my cat gets when she's getting a can of food.
I had a dream I hooked up with Post Malone. I can still smell the dream
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