why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
just checked my call log and realized that we talked for 3 mns. what did i say for that long?
pretty standard. you have fun last night?
apparently....what exactly does 'pretty standard' mean?
typical hot then cold, followed by a death threat.
He did a double fist pump when he discovered the Magnums fit and skipped back towards the bed.
I miss seeing your mom and dad at church, well mostly just your mom... She used to hug my face into her boobs.
I envy you so much. I get girls who pee on my floor and you get girls who leave in the middle of the night
I am officially out of liquor stores within a 15 mile radius that don't recognize me as soon as I walk in the door.
i have wind burn on my face from my head hanging out the window of the cab vomitting
I'm on my fifth double. This night is getting better whether it likes it or not.
I just want you to know if you wake up tomorrow morning and wreak of mustard, I was not involved.
during charades she pointed to herself and you guessed 'girl who wants to fuck me'
I vaguely remember telling a bum she was worth more than this
Quick question: is it impolite to pause sex to put on my knee brace?
I don't know why I bit your face last night but I'm sorry .
The uber man and I sat in silence. With my underwear in my purse and my dress shoved in the pocket of the hoodie the guy gave me.
I'm still amazed at how you managed to get Doritos in my damn front pocket without me noticing. I got crumbs everywhere.
Randomize
