i was just at lovers lane looking for gifts for a bachelorette party.....with my mom
Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
I made myself breakfast and everything and then whoever's house it actually was came downstairs very upset.
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
He told me he doesn't dance and he hates drunken excitement. Why I ever thought it would work is beyond me.
Whatever. I indirectly made you cum overseas. Call it even.
He made me sneak beer in the diaper bag... guess who is winning 2012 parents of the year
Ever walked into a basement full of 10 guys jerking it to a live stripper? Cause I have. Always confirm the address of a house party. Always.
Beer, water, beer, water, beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer so much beer
I think that all guys are assholes, some of them just have less assholeish qualities that we accept in our lives and that we can look past enough to deal. They have to be a pretty special asshole.
I'm pretty sure I asked his brother if he was gay while drunkenly falling to the ground.
At the light, his mom pulled up next to us while I was giving him road head. He forgot to tell me she was meeting us at the movie. So long story short, I convinced her I drove myself, pick me up in 20.
god i just can't wait for finals to end so i can just masturbate all day and night
I'm pretty sure even the managers want me to show up hungover my last day, it would be negligent and disrespectful to do otherwise
I visited the library for the first time in my college career tonight and I got laid. I think I'm gonna come back...
Randomize
