we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
You were so drunk you tried to sell your salsa to everyone on the restaurant.
Midnight run for medical supplies ended several hours later with a lapdance to the Braveheart soundtrack.
I JUST MET THE GIANT MAN THAT WILL CARRY ME FROM PLACE TO PLACE
Ssssssssssshhhhhhhhhhhiiiiiiii!iiiiiiiiiitttttttttttttttssssssssssssshhhhhhhhooooooooowwwwwww. Letters for emphaSSIIISISEEEE!
U know that drunk state, where at 930 the next morning your sitting in a bath in ur bathing suit trying to sober up...yeah. That's where i am..
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
I asked my mom if she could pick up something for me to drink since we ran out of orange juice and she goes "We have beer, champagne, and baileys. Drink one of those."
I guess that means I was blowing a nerd last week.
And loving it.
I used my dress as a plate for pizza rolls last night
The guy who was interviewing me asked if I had coke on my pants. You win this time Las Vegas
Tempted to tell the Titos promoters at this bar that they are doing the lords work.
You left your pants here again. 4th time in a row. How can you walk home without pants?
I don’t want to brag, but vows, morals and will power are no match for my blow job skills
Randomize
