it really sends the message that i like to impregnate mortal women and have them birth fantastic half man-half god infants.
that's not even the weird part though. he already knew where the bathroom was, he might have been here before..
I can count the number of hours she's been sober this weekend on one hand.
he was gone before i woke up. left a pee stain, phone number, note and $20 for sheets. safe to say i will not be calling.
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she slipped a pinky in my ass. Not sure if I came because I liked it or if I was terrified by it.
I don't think there was a moment this weekend where grey goose did not course through my veins
If we laid all the dicks that's have been inside of us end to end it would be as tall as 4 story building. 40 feet of dicks.
tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition
I yelled kanye while he was fucking me. It just felt right
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I just rode a horse than walked onto my property in boarshorts, flip flops, and holding a 40. What do I win?
Sorry that I was such a monster last night. It was the drugs, I promise.
Just went grocery shopping with a vibrator in my purse and didn't even realize it. This is what Saturdays are made for.
immediately after sex he started talking to me about nerdy stuff he meant to text me earlier, I'm completely smitten
When i was leaving for work this morning, i realized the neighbor was passed out drunk, with no pants, and a half eaten whopper on my lawn. Knowing that hey..we have all been there before.. i decided to give him a pillow and a blanket rather than wake him up.
I boned my sugar daddy for the first time yesterday and now I know why they say guys in their 40s are the best. Also I’m getting a car.
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