why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
totally got the gold medal for the best fence jump when the cops came.
i am officially better prepared for a hangover tomorrow than i was for christmas.
This was all being yelled across a beer pong table as all important things should be discussed
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He walked in AS I was cumming. Now even my father knows I'm a squirter.
Judging that there's a photo of me getting head while sitting on a graveyard tombstone.....not good.
I'm pretty sure I just had a convo with my hot pockets about how they weren't good enough for the oven.
I feel like a squirrel prepping for the winter on dollar beer nights.
I knew my sign language would come in handy. I just used sign to coordinate a coke deal.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Or stump rather since he's possibly large. Large penises don't have tips, just blunt ends of battering rams.
I feel as if we moved beyond the hook up stage when she blew me as I drunkenly finished my chicken nuggets.
Would I chase a raccoon with a flaming stick sober?
let me drop the bass on your empty vagina syndrome
You left wolverine marks
I'm somewhere between sorry and proud
My gynecologist got a full view of the obviously bite marked shaped bruises on my thighs. I just kept talking about work and hoped she wouldn't judge me.
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