Texts From Last Night

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  (248): View more from Michigan

  god i wish i could take a shit and a shower at the same time

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  (248): god i wish i could take a shit and a shower at the same time http://tfl.nu/psyk
  Replies (10) Good night (1370) Bad night (756)
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  (484): View more from Pennsylvania

  problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.

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  (484): problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help. http://tfl.nu/wb6w
  Replies (8) Good night (655) Bad night (1783)
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  (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  It was my birthday today and i decided that i am not checking my notifications on facebook so ill feel popular

  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  Wrong number and your a loser

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  (215): It was my birthday today and i decided that i am not checking my notifications on facebook so ill feel popular (610): Wrong number and your a loser http://tfl.nu/k831
  Replies (32) Good night (1451) Bad night (8686)
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  (727): View more from Florida

  im just going to superglue mistletoe to my forehead and see what happens

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  (727): im just going to superglue mistletoe to my forehead and see what happens http://tfl.nu/tbzs
  Replies (36) Good night (5696) Bad night (1239)
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  (206): View more from Washington

  woke up to the trail of sugar cubes leading to my bed........was i that uncooperative last night

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  (206): woke up to the trail of sugar cubes leading to my bed........was i that uncooperative last night http://tfl.nu/9u90
  Replies (14) Good night (6462) Bad night (1123)
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  (925): View more from California

  I literally paid him in shots to clean my entire apartment. he even vacuumed...who said alcoholism is a bad thing??

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  (925): I literally paid him in shots to clean my entire apartment. he even vacuumed...who said alcoholism is a bad thing?? http://tfl.nu/da8e
  Replies (14) Good night (3807) Bad night (978)
• Favorite

  (585): View more from New York

  I've developed breathing exercises to keep myself from puking..

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  (585): I've developed breathing exercises to keep myself from puking.. http://tfl.nu/q39t
  Replies (10) Good night (3561) Bad night (941)
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  (510): View more from California

  I think I need to stop sleeping with him. Sex with him is just a reminder of the mediocrity of the rest of my life.

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  (510): I think I need to stop sleeping with him. Sex with him is just a reminder of the mediocrity of the rest of my life. http://tfl.nu/v2uu
  Replies (5) Good night (1225) Bad night (2778)
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  (254): View more from Texas

  Our kitchen sink faucet is leaking, so I set a pitcher under it to catch water for Kool-Aid tomorrow rather than turn on the faucet. The environment owes me.

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  (254): Our kitchen sink faucet is leaking, so I set a pitcher under it to catch water for Kool-Aid tomorrow rather than turn on the faucet. The environment owes me. http://tfl.nu/nie2
  Replies (9) Good night (3990) Bad night (1070)
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  (716): View more from New York

  I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.

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  (716): I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina. http://tfl.nu/pbex
  Replies (12) Good night (1225) Bad night (2753)
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  (905): View more from Ontario

  Rule #127: If your going to try fuck a married guy, you gotta be hotter then his wife; diet starts today.

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  (905): Rule #127: If your going to try fuck a married guy, you gotta be hotter then his wife; diet starts today. http://tfl.nu/u9so
  Replies (37) Good night (1350) Bad night (3062)
• Favorite

  (509): View more from Washington

  Is it too early to start a donation jar for my 4th of july hospital bills?

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  (509): Is it too early to start a donation jar for my 4th of july hospital bills? http://tfl.nu/9geb
  Replies (5) Good night (1299) Bad night (584)
• Favorite

  (727): View more from Florida

  She kept asking for cigarettes, than just put them in her purse as "savings"

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  (727): She kept asking for cigarettes, than just put them in her purse as "savings" http://tfl.nu/mihx
  Replies (1) Good night (610) Bad night (371)
• Favorite

  (702): View more from Nevada

  Either I think of sex like a man, or all the men in Vegas are women.

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  (702): Either I think of sex like a man, or all the men in Vegas are women. http://tfl.nu/b3we
  Replies (3) Good night (586) Bad night (362)
• Favorite

  (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  It was 6am and he went immediately for the 69. WTF?? 6am is WAY to early for acrobatics.

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  (215): It was 6am and he went immediately for the 69. WTF?? 6am is WAY to early for acrobatics. http://tfl.nu/pu5z
  Replies (4) Good night (419) Bad night (185)

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