My mom says you aren't allowed to eat doritos at my house
I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
I am the Bobby Fisher of drunk asss puking
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm hoping to finish this bottle of wine before I pass out, I don't want the remainder spilling on my white down comforter.
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
I Know I'm the drunk girl in the trunk right now, BUT PLEASE LISTEN TO ME!
Just realized that St. Patty's is on a Saturday this year in case you were interested in coming to New York and redefining bender with me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I AM NOT THE MAN IN THIS RELATIONSHIP.
It's shit like this that makes people think we're gay.
Though I don't usually want to turn down ladies who want to liquify my clothing with their eyes, I made an exception.
Also mom is not happy about me telling her how much i want the women sprinters on the Olympics to beat me up
I dont remember you getting a condom thrown at you. I think I had a concusion
I think I just got booty called by someone I've never slept with or even really had a conversation with before.
You know that panicky moment when you go home with a guy and realize you’ve been there before?!? HAPPENING RIGHT NOW!!!
Turns out I banged his son a few months ago but the kids back at college so I don’t have to worry about him walking in while Dad has me bent over the couch
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