I just had human shit waiting for me at the top of the escalator at Bowery. This is truly the Lord's day.
May the Lord look upon you in favor and give you pees.
I wish I could still say I don't know that you taste like bad ice cream.
He said I came instead of I'm coming. I wonder if he noticed my state of confusion when I stopped blowing him.
Wasn't he an English major?
I woke up to him eating cereal out of my viking helmet with a shot glass. No idea where he got the milk.
Preparing for wine wednesday. How would you feel about improvising and starting a white russian wednesday tomorrow instead? you know, shake things up a bit.
Europeans suck. I just gave him head and somehow i am the one paying for the coffee
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
there is no amount of schooling that prepares you for when your morbidly obese 45 year old patient tells you she has her clit pierced.
Oh you know, sitting here in my bathing suit watching antiques road show and petting the cat. Just the usual
I did a hand stand against the glass wall at Ziggy's with no panties on and got 3 phone numbers. Thank God I shaved this morning...
My entire grocery store purchase consisted of Little Debbie snacks and Budweiser
An orgasm and grocery shopping is the appropriate start to every Monday.
We're going to get naked and build a fort instead. HAPPY NEW YEAR!
I got very very very high last night and bought a cotton candy machine on eBay
I have dined. Now I want to get fucked.
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