I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
party was madd awkward.. it was like every person who i sat next to in high school and never said hi to was there
Strawberries are so good its weird that food is growable
we were frolicking through a fountain of pizza rolls. it was like the best dream i ever had
Since when is my name a synonym for head?
right before he came he said "im ganna fill your stocking" nothing like holiday spirit!!
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
How does one fall all the way up a flight of stairs? Its hard on me knowing that the survival of our species depends on me not reproducing.
This is so stupid. Now I have to call the party planner and tell her that the break up party is off. They decided to get back together.
My mind hurts. I feel like I drank sand yesterday.
You can't say "they have anal bleaching for that" and then just hang up
You won't wear your Santa suit, I can't get trashed, and you won't use handcuffs! This is the worst Christmas EVER.
I was so high. I had so much hair. It was like all my hair follicles exploded.
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
Listen, yo... we need to have a serious conversation about this Dollar Store toilet paper. Because if I’m going to finger someone’s ass, it’s not going to be my own.
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