Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
Girl last night got so wet when I was going on down her it flooded up my nose. I nearly drown
I'm at my inlaws playing Scrabble. Go Fuck Yourself.
The girl I was getting head from just called my dick an anteater...I hate my parents for not cutting my cock tip off.
Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
I can't believe they didnt cut us off after we all hugged each other and started singing "were the 3 best friends that anybody could have" RIGHT IN FRONT of the bar and bartender...
shes the kind of girl that would cock block endangered pandas
I'm sorry and I love you. One day we're going to live in a whore mansion with our babies and make boys cry.
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
Hostess is going out of business we'll never survive the apocalypse
Also, no joke, I think that raccoon hair is still in my eye from last night.
I think he's hit rock bottom. You know it's a low point in life when you cry because you weren't invited to sit in a box car and watch porn with two other straight dudes.
You've changed since you got that strap on
There was already gay porn open on my laptop with a tiny carrot cake, a bottle of water, and a note saying "I love you, Sober Me."
Drunk me just hits it and quits it.
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