i just got a Mexican deported. not sure how to feel.
she was seriously choking and the whole time all he kept saying was "that's what she said"
It was like a lincoln log. Seriously. I don't know who's more pissed, me or my vagina...worst.hookup.ever.
He came up there while i was bartending, ate a salad, told me he wanted to divorce me, then tipped me 10 dollars....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Now there are two cop cars. If I go to jail I just would like to thank you for making me wear boxers.
I feel like I've been drunk all of June. And I am in NO WAY ashamed about it.
frozen drink friday is suspended until further notice
there's chocolate cake in my bathtub.. I don't even want to know how the hell chocolate cake wound up in my tub..
I had to keep telling myself 'you can't be mad at him because you peed on him'
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So he drunk messaged me last night telling me he wants a baby. Think I should call his bluff?
He painted a swimsuit on me. Naked day at the lake was a success.
Fuck that guy and his dumb haircut and awesome dick
I always can't wait to see you but when there's also an opportunity to get naked it elevates to an entirely different level
Let's ride this possibly pregnant train together
You’ll (maybe) appreciate that I picked at my ingrown hair again. Quarantine updates are getting BLEAK.
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