Bea Arthur died! :(
What?
Big bird passed.
All my problems are solved. I just got McDonalds and scratch off lottery tickets.
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
My grandma just told me that she sharted, no I am not having fun in El Paso.
The dog just did a longer kegstand than anyone at the party
so its official, girls can see a boner through my snuggie.
Apparently I also called my credit card company to demand a credit limit increase. I'm so content with not drinking another 60 days
I think a 5 ft pyramid of jello shots in honor of the egyptians is in order
Did I really just find a cheez- it box full of condoms in your room?
The cop said he like my hair today. Please explain all other interactions with law enforcement, k thanks
Stripping out of my teacher clothes to Talk Dirty to Me. Who let me become a teacher?
Cocaine is ok on a cleanse, right?
She sent me a video of herself sitting in the car stone faced listening to the Titanic song on silence. She won't answer my texts.
He keeps singing a song about someone called the dayman.
....fighter of the Nightman?
Nothing quite like spending your evening singing Shania Twain I Feel Like a Woman barbershop quartet Style with some homeless guys outside of Keyport liquor. love Shania Twain. How's your Sunday?
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