O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
tell me how a rose bowl party involves waking up to find a raccoon in my kitchen cabinet eating my oreos the next morning?
I just wanna go home eat some pizza rolls, get warm and jerk off, and it's only 845. This shit was supposed to make me see unicorns. Not cry
All i remember is people cheering me on to drink faster than the dog, out of the dog's bowl. I just couldn't stop.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He was drinking a long island through his Breathalyzer tube.
Freedom, beauty, truth, and love to all. I also probably have syphilis
I just took my birth control with a water bottle I found in my purse with vodka in it in Spanish class. 10am is still too early for me.
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
You had two tasks: \n1) put on a condom \n2) text me so I don't walk in on you \nIt really isn't that hard
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Look bro I'll go half per boob with you, we split her.
Just wanted to let you know it's 3am and, at this point, I believe your sister has more of my semen in her than I do. So suck on that, fuckface.
Reasonably certain my seventh grade teacher is encouraging me to drop acid on twitter
Don't need my thirties to be known as the decade of "new types of shits from drinking" like last night.
He left for work so I drank pickle juice from his fridge
I'll bring spiced rum
I am not drinking that devil juice
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