Ha. Yes. I'm at a strip club. I'm the barack obama of strip clubs
Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
We turned everything surrounding BP and the oil leak into a "that's what she said" drinking game. We've been drunk for a month
When were having sex he was mumbling some guys name. If he wasn't as hot as he is I'd be concerned.
He fell off a seesaw, tore half his ear off and somehow convinced the paramedic he was allowed to have a beer while being treated
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
He yearns for your heart.
He needs to stop being a pussy about it.
She asked for references to decide whether she wanted to have sex with me. And she was serious.
You seriously don't remember crying about how much you miss your mom right before we hooked up?
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
Our prom king just sent me a dick pic. I know it's 10 years later but I feel like I've finally made it.
DIBS on your mom for my beer pong partner.
if anyone asks you the platypus in my bathtub is a gift...thats all anyone needs to know
He ate me out for an eternity. Like fell asleep, woke up, and he was still doing it.
Randomize
