my lips still taste like vagina
so you liked breakfast?
ehh, still wish we woulda went to IHOP instead
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
I just remembered yelling "they're gonna let me be a lawyer! Me! Why would they do that?"
Can you call him, he said something about going to the balcony to pee and now hes texting me saying hes lost
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We had sex in front of Notre Dame Cathedral, but I lost my wallet. God giveth and God taketh away.
Wow. A quad shot of peppermint schnapps. I feel like I just deep throated a candy cane. Best 21st ever.
playing nyquil roulette. it entails taking shots of nyquil and hoping it doesnt kick in during sex or in public. game on.
dude i should have never cleaned my ears out while high. theres no going back.
Do you ever feel like your dog agrees with you? Like REALLY really agrees.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Maybe it was that imaginary ghost dick you were stuffing in your mouth a minute ago
for me, it's working out the tricky timing of the Viagra and nightly laxative.
that is either the most profound and meaningful thing i've ever heard, or someone got high before noon again.
I sense lesbianism
That's a weird power
He had a hook in his ceiling. I think I'm in love!
mate iv just woke up in the garden. either help me inside or bring out my vodka
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