Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
You should have seen k-money last night. She was just hanging on to the toilet for half the night. By her fourth trip to puke, she started talking to it and was doing the voices for her and it. She kept saying "...we thank you for your continued business..." haha
i turned job hunting into a drinking game..
its not fair. if i was a guy, i'd be getting a high five for banging two in one night.
Yep we found him face down in my sister's bathroom begging for blowjobs without mustard
Road trip to buy me a baby zebra..are you in or are you in?
Me and him getting it in is for special occasions only. Like Christmas and when they bring the McRib back.
I wish I cared about making my vagina as presentable as you do.
Like how hard is it to come up to me with chocolate and wine and say "hey, you're beautiful. Wanna marathon Doctor Who in sweatpants?" Hell yes!
Just laying in bed with my vibrator eating cold tortillas and listening to Savage Garden.
HAVE BEEN SPEAKING IN RUSSIAN ACCENT FOR 5 HOURS
SHIRT GONE
Does going to a local bar count as taking part in Small Business Saturday? Asking for a friend
No ive been in the mountains getting high and baking cookies with a 4 year old
Is it too forward if I ask him to bring a condom when he comes over to work on our project?
I woke up this morning to find my closet lacking 98% of my clothes and a text from my male roommate saying your dresses squeeze my genitals
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