I passed out leaning next to a light pole. When the cop woke me up at 4 AM, I told him I was a block away from the apt, just had to stop to make a puke pit stop.
I found him in the livingroom trying to soak up broken glass with the clock from the kitchen.
thats the sluttiest christmas spirit ever.
I know I said I wouldn't, but he told me I looked like Mila Kunis. Reasons not to fuck him, go.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
Well it's official... The first guy I ever gave head to now holds 2 world records. Should I text him asking if I can try and break my record?
You me handle of captain and a sorostitute study sesh, if we don't get laid mancards must be relinquished
I'm at the hospital waiting for my sister to push out her kid. I think I'll roam the halls and shame all the teenage mothers.
Kinda forgot to grab tampons. Mind if I run to my house to get one? I'd rather not turn my green skinny jeans Christmas colors
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He sent me a recycled dick pic! He could at least use one without sunlight in it, considering it's 10pm
I think we've reached the point in the summer were we need to go back to school. I was so bored yesterday I nearly bought blow dart gun.
I wasn't going to just ask my parents for a damn vibrator for christmas
I serenaded the cat in the hat for a few 90s songs but idk who he is
I'm hungover and eating lunch at an elementary school. The children are barking. Litrealy barking, like dogs.
Everything is a learning experience. Last night we learned why I'm not allowed to bring guys home from the bar....
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