after I pulled back my foreskin she said, "cool like a transformer". I really like her now.
I have "you made mistakes last night" written alllll over me.
just got passed by a van of kids watching the little mermaid. debating speeding so i can watch
Didn't u have court just yesterday for ur driving?
IT'S THE LITTLE MERMAID! totally worth another year of probation
Does it make me a prostitute if I accepted a Life House concert ticket for giving this guy head?
No. It just means your good at giving head.
She told me she needed to clarify that we are not fuck buddies, we are best friends that have sex once in a while
He just asked for the blowjob I promised him 3 years ago that he'd get the next time Michigan beat Ohio State. Goddamnit.
you were leaning up against the wall pulling your shirt up asking girls to dance on you. your courage to do that is both admirable and frightening.
I also got a mission for you and you're gonna love it. Biggest. Hospital. Party. Ever.
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
We were all day drunk by 2pm. Now I know why they hate Americans
even my drug dealer wished me a happy birthday before my mother did.
I'm about to eat a 2month old weed brownie I just found in my lax duffel bag. will you answer if I call you in like an hour and a half
He said I have a comfortable vagina. What does that even mean?
I slept like a rock because of your dick. I'll thank him personally later.
I just walked in on her masturbating to a social anxiety video...
Randomize
