i hope my daughter doesn't end up with cankles. no guy likes cankles.
You can now add 30,000 feet to the places where I have puked
I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
I think hes settled down now. He's just licking the walls and the windows.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Weed smoke burps in the boss's face. Job security.
Get to the bar. Power hour leading up to the rapture.
I'm dressed like a deranged cupcake. Let's get fucked up.
I borrowed a glass of wine. And the bottle. Your cat said it was ok
she's five days sober.....are those consecutive????
5 days not 5 nights... like a bad hotel/vacation deal
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
I gave him a blowjob to kill bill. 2 of my favorite things.
Oh damn it. Let me get a beer. I can't take anymore bad news. Hold on.
You're going to love the baby's room.
I doubt it. I can't have sex there anymore. That severely limits the appeal of the room to me.
His PENIS is so fucking big that I always use caps, out of respect.
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
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