Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
I just farted for five sidewalk sections! New personal best.
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
In my 8 am class there was a pack of birth control on the board with a note saying, "Some dude somewhere is unhappy."
i just overheard a girl at the next table saying she gave up sex for lent
don't you ever do that...
just passed out while on hold to see if i left my debit card at the bar last night.
She said we should all be mermaids since didn't breathe for 9 months inside our mothers. I want her logic.
Look. You've gotta stop making this about you, and make it about my vagina.
In brighter news I got condoms and a mattress protector today.
I didnt want you guys to know I needed to puke, so I just nonchalantly did in my solo cup and threw it out the window
We watched the first ever season of SNL and fucked for so long. He accidentally punched me in the face, but I mean, John Belushi was the background noise of our sex. I can deal with it.
When we got home I apparently addressed everyone as 'peasant' since it was my birthday, this followed by me demanding for my "peasants to wash me".
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
He threatened my life and my car because I called you. Are you sure you never slept with him ?
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
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