Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
I feel like our bond as friends is a lot stronger now that I've talked to you on the phone while having sex.
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
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What a whore. She reminds me of that asian guy who can eat all the hotdogs.
I won the karaoke contest at the bar last night, when they called my name i was doing blow off the toilet seat, i thought they caught me, i didnt even know there wasa contest
Dude, somewhere around here makes 4loko slushies. I just decided coming home isn't so bad.
she gave me her number. found out it was already stored in my phone as "bathroom blowjob"
she's drunk at 2 in the afternoon again. at least my mother is predictable.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I accidentally got a lemon stuck in your bong. I was trying to make it taste good. Sorry
YOU COME FROM SAD WHALE FAMILY, DEEP IN OCEAN!
WHY DID I INFORM THE ENTIRE BATHROOM I DONT HAVE AN STD?!?!?!!
I never realized how you can accidentally go home with someone until tequila got involved.
I really don't want to get drunk alone tonight. Like, I'll do it, but I won't enjoy it.
don't worry, i'm not mad. i'm just angry. and furious. and about to set your ass on fire.
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