I attract so much trash. The guy that is engaged and kissed me is here so is his fiancé. I feel likeshw knows and will cut me in the bathroom might happen. If I'm not at the pool tomorrow she has blonde hair and is really flat.
it was like she wanted to be a once a week night stand
i just google imaged poop.
Does it count as a shower if I just sat in the tub singing I'm a Little Teapot?
he has cookie breath... dont trust fat people.
just watched the video of me leading you with a trail of french fries.
Make sure to show her the sewer we were arrested in on your tour.
I AM SAFE. EVERYTHING IS FOG. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED.
It's like split custody, only he's not a kid and they have sex with him.
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
Dude you made a rodeo shot in beer pong won the game then got in the hot tub poured beer all over the side and screamed "hot tub time machine!"...
This hangover makes more sense now
FYI, Sammie and I made the executive decision that we're getting a pet octopus and keeping it in the ballpit. Just thought you should know.
she made me cum so hard I dislocated my jaw. I'm keeping her
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
Best and worst whiskey dick ever. I am hungover and can't move from the hours of sex, he on the other hand has a raw bruised dick. I win.
Randomize