I asked her if she watches the office. She said no, but do you watch I'm a celebrity get me outa here? That's when i knew. Deal breaker
At least you didnt end up topless in a Tina Turner wig singing cabaret tunes
You yelled "bananas are an excellent source of pottasium!"4 times in the middle of class. how do you not remember?
I don't even know what potassium is.
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
19 People Who Had An Inappropriate Celebrity Encounter
Our dealer is pledging my frat. When he come to sell me weed I make him take out the garbage.
You do realize that we got a stripper to do the YMCA for us on the main stage... Right?
He asked the clerk if they sell a penis-shaped brander.
You just kept screaming at everyone 'not to break your scarf' and doing somersaults
Casually brushing the Bacardi out of my hair. It's a good time to ponder regretting everything that happened last night.
21 Awkward Ways People Found Out Their Partner Was Into Outrageous Sex Acts
His search history includes homemade sex toys and a plunger. I'm scared about what goes on in their place.
There's a picture of you on facebook laying in the street with 3 cops standing over you after you faceplanted off that guy's shoulders.
Is that what happened to my face?!
You slid down the wall and got into the fetal position. He was definitely judging... I was judging....
My drug dealer just made me weigh out my own weed because he was in the middle of taking his law enforcement final
Why do all the Father's Day cards talk about what a great dad they are? Why can't there be one that says something like "Thanks for sticking it to mom and making me possible, your sperm was appreciated."
I've pulled 4 ticks off of me. This is the last time I suck dick in the wild.