just come out here and I will go home with you...
I didn't go out last night, but I dreamed that I blacked out and the *CRAZY* thing I did was to eat 12 cupcakes off 12 diff plates and stack them up neatly. If I had a life, I'd hate it.
so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
You know it's an interesting night when you drunkenly scream at your boss, "You'd make a HORRIBLE OBGYN!! You're hands are ENORMOUS!"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just woke up and he was jacking off in the corner.. am i being punked?
Well It's time to grow up anyways, right? Now that you're graduated and have a job you can't drink uncontrollably
No. Now that I'm graduated I can drink uncontrollably at nicer bars
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
There was a staple in my grits at waffle house last night. My knees are bruised as hell. And I puked pink all over my bathroom. Gooood night.
THIS IS A FLATMATE WARNING! The white powder next to sink is washing powder I spilled and is not meant for human comsumption. I repeat- do not digest, snort or smoke the white powder next to the sink!!!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my dad has now seen 6 different dudes grab my ass. i guess i should start a list.
I need a conscience and I need it yesterday.
Like, I want sex but I also would be okay with Netflix
Our office went out together for the first time to celebrate the fact our coworker got fired.
You gotta come over now. He is eating cupcakes while they are still in the foil.
Are you really trying to argue your case that you seduced my cat?
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