between no blow jobs for the rest of his life, or no cheese for the rest of his life, he chose no blowjobs. ive never felt so bad about my bj abilities before
Just so you know, coffee creamer+water does not = milk.
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
my fraternity brothers just had an intervention for me. i either have a problem or am just on some next-level shit, im gonna go with door number 2
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You threw a hot dog at his face...I wouldn't call you either.
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
just mapquested my walk of shame from saturday..bye bye freshman 15
Don't forget ur talking to the master juggler. Remember that time I slept with 3 guys and made them all pay for plan b? Paid the rent didn't I?
Yep I can make a seagull sound. It's identical. I tried it. They thought I was talking to them. It's pretty cool.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Showing up to Easter hungover, late, and covered in black an blues from pole dancing. Daughter of the year.
We could have had it all. And by all I mean sex in your Toyota Corolla.
Sorry about waking up naked in your bed this morning.
Have you ever been so high that you felt like corduroy? I'm at that level.
i'm extremely hungover on the ski bus and the driver is playing abba. this. is. not. okay.
so i find a box of condoms inside my car with turn by turn directions to her bedroom... kinda freaked out cause she got my address and somehow inside my car
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