she was wearing a cheetah print one-piece and i slept with her anyway. big mistake.
I just walked into his bathroom to see two poops floating... no toilet paper. WTF!?
i would never do something against you youre the best i ever had
please tell me you did not just intentionally quote drake..
Party at my house. Liquor pinata. Your presence is required.
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
I'm really sorry we tried to have sex on top of you last night.
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
Just had a threesome with a hot Turkish guy and an even hotter French lawyer. This what happens when I travel alone. You have only yourself to blame for this.
Unfortunately hes not a hipster douchebag with no life goals, so naturally I'm not interested.
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
yeah, never be friends with someone with shitty eyebrows.. they obviously already make poor life choices
hi I'm Emily and I thoroughly enjoy getting minors hammered.. I'll start my AA intro just like that.
6 showers laters and I still feel like I have his vomit in my vagina. At least I could help him figure out he's gay.
Apparently the girl he banged in the bathroom yelled at him for hitting on me all night. But whatever, he was holding her hand for most of it
Yeah, sometimes it takes a while to realize, wow you kind of suck and not in the fun way
Randomize
