i went to throw her on my bed and threw her straight in to my bike
hey as creepy as this sounds i still have your eyelashes on my desk
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
He came in my eye, I lost my earring and all of his friends saw me topless. Happy New Year to you as well.
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
I promise a much better performance tomorrow than last night my penis has a bed time
You know when you can feel the alcohol in your toes? That's a great feeling.
i think i swapped my keys for drugs last night
Can I just say I love that you have a kegorator on your wedding registry?
Getting day drunk before work is perfectly acceptable when its 99 cent margaritas.
I noticed while having sex on Friday that I have great endurance. CrossFit works.
Then, he ate me out while I watched Bo Burnham. Best. Night. Ever.
He said that we couldn't refer to each other as brother and sister anymore cuz we were in no way related and he would love nothing more than to get naked with me.
she just kept straddling the railing to the stairs and shouting "come on Seabiscuit, lets win this for America."
I was drunk in the shower and i decided to shave. Im now bleeding to death
Randomize
