So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
Either I get my picture taken sitting on a fuckin pony, or I'm not coming.
how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
Also managed to rip my pants and set myself on fire. And oddly enough I'm still not ready to ask for 2010 back.
There's a skull full of vodka. How bad can it be?
I peed glitter this morning and had a beard drawn on my face with eyeliner. Last time I do shots with gay Dan.
Oh, I forgot to ask if u have any idea what happened to the back of my ear and if u were present when I almost fell off the roof...
No, man, we stole the housekeeper's key and we're just going room to room raiding mini fridges. Hurry
Logan has the vodka and snickers. We're making a run for it. Room 302
Dude tried texting you during but she threw my pants too far away
it's pretty awkward texting you how much I want to suck your cock when I have my mom on speakerphone.
On my way
If it's any consolation, I made really strong brownies yesterday and had 3 and then I saw demons
He said that he made a girl squirt to the ceiling and I got curious
If muffins & morning blowjobs don't make him happy, frankly, I don't think anything will.
You just sat there staring at your apple and saying "I'm so glad you're here" to it every time you took a bite.
Idk but when you think about it the last time I did bottomless mimosas I ended up getting my nipples pierced so it might be fair
Randomize
