She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
wtf. i just found you're porn stash.
u like it?
NOT THE POINT.
Sometimes I forget to take my socks off when I masturbate. This always makes me feel like I'm accidentally in a porn.
So while she was giving me a lap dance I told her I quit med school. Just so she didn't feel like the only one who's made bad decisions in their life.
I often get tempted to walk up to her drunk ass and say, "shouldn't you be taking care of your kid?"
i came out of my blackout when my grandma called last night. it kinda sobered me up and i realized who i had been making out with. should i call and thank her for the defensive cockblock?
If I wanted to fuck someone, I'd go for John. I'm meeting Bryan cuz I wanna get to know him better. And eventually fuck him. But not this Tuesday.
I remember you licked my face and said that's all you're getting
You tried to pay for our cab with the 2 dollars you got from selling your natty ice outside the strip club.
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
An hour is enough time for me to get drunk and win a dry hump marathon so I hope you have somewhat similar or better goals
i told her i loved her afterwards and she said "i know," kissed me, and got up to start making breakfast.
dude, she han solo'd you. keep her.
Guess who isn't pregnant with a random sex ocean baby?!?!
Every time you talk about your facial hair I immedately get horny
I swear to God if you start calling your dick “my pegasus” we’re not friends anymore
Randomize
