I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
he fingered my asshole thinking it was my vag...I couldn't bring myself to tell him, mostly from shame for me and pity for him
Why the fuck is BBQ sauce coming out of my shower head?
They had half off shots during the fourth quarter. I was powerless.
In case you were unaware playing with rabbits on ecstasy is the greatest thing ever. I feel like I'm ODing on adorable right now.
Do you ever just look at me and get embarrassed?
Standing in a circle of girls fistpumping to the word "hospital" while taking shots.... I don't see this ending well, but its fucking fun.
I defriended her. I just can't support someone whose profile picture is of their water birth.
I'm not a horrible person, I just see what everyone chooses to politely ignore.. And occasionally say it aloud whilst deeply intoxicated.
He held the beaver pelt from the fireplace over my crotch and asked his friend "she look familiar now?", he then remembered my name.
Dilemas of the modern woman: deciding whether or not to write on your ex's wall for his birthday. This is serious.
Oh my god. That was the best half-hour of my life that didn't involve genitals.
Jessica just ate her lipstick. That's how the night is going
I just got high and swiffered the bathroom floor....2 for 2 on brilliant life ideas
Executive decision.... we are cuddling naked
Randomize
