Just saw a man jogging. For recreation. At 3am. Who's he training to be, batman?
Someone told me they could tell we were from cincinnati because we say "as fuck" after adjectives
you'll never believe how fucking awesome rain man is when you're stoned.
I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i realized really quickly that drinking a bottle of vodka and 3 crystal light packets wasn't the best idea i've ever had
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
I think that "I fucked your little brother" wasn't the best way to introduce yourself.....
We went to the casino to try to earn enough money to go to new Orleans comfortably. I'm already drunk. This is a horribly immoral start to summer.
Well, let's see..I held him while he cried for 30-40 minutes, woke up on his couch AND he gave me a ride home in his underwear. Shit show is not even the half of it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't know why you're always hating on relationships. I've had chocolate pancakes accompanied by a blowjob and a blunt and it's not even 9 am. Time for mid morning shower sex. Enjoy your morning bong bowl alone asshole
I'm going to fake an anxiety attack to get to the front of the line. Save me some brisket.
She said if her future children dont have blue eyes she wont love them
30% sure Kevin and I just adopted a cat. Talk to me when the sun's up but I really feel like that's a thing.
My weirdest encounter with a stranger though was when for some reason they just gave me a box of unopened socks. Needless to say, I never used them.
The Game of Thrones convention was just a drunk fuckfest.
Please tell me you banged Jon Snow.
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