the guy I was hooking up with asked me if he could wear a guerilla suit during sex.
So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
Thursdays are my worst days
but now we sippin champagne when we thirstay?
No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
I just watched dragonflies fucking. You can't match that level of geek.
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
Haha yeah that's basically it. He was like "i've always had a thing for you, and even sober i still would do and feel the same way." so glad to know i am worthy of a sober hookup as well.
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
I can't believe I'm giving you play by plays of this sexting convo. It's like a three way he doesn't know about.
Getting robbed by hookers is def a right of passage in a mans life
Yeah I was just reminiscing about that time a seagull shit on your head at the beach
It's hard not to feel like a terrible person with bruises on your tits.
My mom found your leather pants in our guest room. She doesn't want to know why they are there, she just wants to know if you want them washed.
still drunk on my way to class to give my presentation on the negative affects of alcohol on the body. hell yes.
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
Randomize
