just did a line in a complete hula outfit off a chick in a devil costume. do you think hell will be this good?
i just got fired from my job because i was "too smart" and my immedate response was i am WAY too stoned to be considered smart, and theni walked out the door.
wow. i have no words.
May God have mercy on my new vibrator.
I thought that since they were twins... they would be equally as good in bed
That's a really weird place to spoon. Especially if there are more accessible places to spoon. Like a bathtub.
Haha so I huess that means he's a little over 7. I can use my throat as a ruler!!
One less school supply you need to buy!!
No driving. The car is spinning. I am praying for mcdonalds.
when i tried to put the condom on he started screaming about how he didn't want his groceries bagged
I wish I could rewind to my 8th birthday instead. I wanna wake up, eat as much cake as I want, and have a Transformers birthday party without someone judging me.
I tried...failed..now im naked on the futon since clothes are hard.
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
I think he's like 40 and maybe a little sociopathetic and i have never been so turned on
Another text to add to the intervention pile, i see
This time tomorrow I will be drunk and in a voodoo shop
Somehow I went from sitting in a car upside down to waking up in the grass surounded by paramedics. It was a great night.
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