Whoever decided putting Tom Seizmore and Heidi Fleiss together in rehab should win some kind of award.
i just realized the only form of arm exercise i get is holding my arms up in the stand up tanning booth
he didn't want to fuck because he was too busy skateboarding. what are we 12? I'm too old for this shit.
so im gonna ask for shark week off tomorrow at work and i advise you do the same
you told grandpa to call you daddy
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
I would like to apologize for my MANY attempts of trying to motor boat you.
Do not buy whiskey under any circumstances. There should be a UN sanctioned buffer zone between me and Seagrams.
Well my friend Jon slept on the couch and I slept next to my cooked lean pocket on the carpet
our friendships a beautiful delicate flower...that has been crushed by peni
I have a lot of questions this morning, most of them start with "Did I..."
it was so good i reconsidered my staunch atheism
I'm going to give you the best blowjob of your life. And yes you can use my mom's printer.
I told him to send me a dick snap for my birthday. To personalize it, he drew a candle coming out of the tip of it so I could blow it out.
Howd last night go?
well he stumbled in my parents door drunk and then asked my mom if she was my grandma. Id say as far as first impressions go, he failed miserably
Randomize
