I met a girl last nite that charged by the inch. i didnt have enough money but i figured shed be a good deal for u
You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
she then came into the room and yelled I'M GOING TO BE A COCK BLOCK for 5 minutes
and all i could think about was how mcdonalds would not be open anymore after we were done having sex
I didnt realize we were having a competition in poor decision making skills
how else could I explain the last few years
You couldve had sex with 2 drunk chicks on an alligator slide.
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
Covered in gravy. Never pour gravy while drinking.
you're going to have to hot glue me into my dress tonight. there's no way out.
How much did you drink?
Enough to be hungover and still think roller coasters were a good idea
just saw sorostitutes streaking near the university president's house. thank you tequila day
If by date you mean washing Pizza house down with a bottle of wine, then yes I have a date.
I remember the Prince Albert and the three penises in the threesome. But the rest no.
christmas shopping: 3 hours in the liquor store...
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
Randomize
