Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
Dude, she literally just asked me if her mac'n'cheese makes me horny. I think I found the one.
I jerked him off and then punched him in the face for no reason. Typical evening drinking Sailor Jerry's.
New level of high: If I could bathe in my salsa right now I would.
Just had to masturbate in the bathroom because mom changed my room into a "knitting" room. I hate coming home.
Just sent my cousin to buy me a new bra cause mine is zip tied to a bar in the middle of nowhere Iowa
Some fat latino guy has these 2 fat white moms making out with each other on the dance floor
I broke out the Krispy Kreme, and am possibly having random internet sex in less than an hour. I think I got this breakup under control.
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
stop falling asleep in the bathtub. you are not a movie star, you cannot die that way.
There is a huge fucking spider in my bathroom....I can just burn our apartment down right? What do you need me to grab?
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
we went outside for a smoke and when we came back in you were ptfo on the floor holding the phone to your ear. Pizza pizza was on the line.
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