Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
I want you to know that after i type the word "your" vagina is next on my predictive tex
Shit sorry. Maybe I wont give you this sweet ass fanny pack I found in my parents attic
I woke up hugging a loaf of bread and a water bottle this morning
My face left an imprint in the loaf...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Having a dry hump session to Alvin and the chipmunks surprisingly didn't kill the mood. He's that good.
Also, my drunkenly packed sleepover kit consisted of a singular sock, my uncharged laptop, and a pack of post-it notes.
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
Discovered a freckle on my clitoris. What have you done today?
She'll feel so accomplished if she finally gets to bang me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The exact people you expect to find at a bar at 2pm are here. Come visit. We'd really like the company.
I volunteer to be the person who breaks into the room and runs around naked and has to be escorted out by police.
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
slept at my ex’s house last night and as i was leaving his brother was sitting there on the sofa and said “bet you regret that one don’t ya”
I am so so sorry I bit your butt last night. Twice.
They just canceled the season. It’s going to be harder to bang soccer moms this year
Randomize