im orety awesome arent i? relly i know i am
For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
bailing my boss out of jail is a great way to spend memorial day
what's with the bloody hand print on the hood of your car
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sometimes I wish I could open my skin and just take a little peek at my liver. You know, just to see if it's rotten yet or still perfect looking.
I woke up naked in his kitchen...His name is Mike and we're having a "what happened last night" beer.
Cant wait to drunkenly tell by kids that i banged their aunt katie in a weird threesome
Am I really that high, or did I just spray febreeze outside ?
The only things in my fridge are almond milk, Smirnoff Ice and chicken noodle soup. I'd say I've done mama proud.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just fist bumped God in my head for last night. What a bro.
well. can officially check "get caught having sex on the front porch by the neighbors" off the bucket list.
Might be using my graduation money to pay for an abortion.
Ain't no cockblock like hearing the word"HOOODOOORR!" shouted from the bedroom floor while in the middle of sex.
i am no longer ashamed when i walk into the dining hall for sunday brunch and i'm greeted with applause for suriving my weekend
Like I’ve seen him completely trashed and I’ve also seen him rip shirtsleeves off with his teeth and I can’t tell if I’m intrigued or not
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