Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
It snowed today. The whore-inducing weather is official over.
i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
you kept yelling "this bitch stole my phone" to the guy who found you passed out in the parking lot
its really sad that i have to specifically make this a rule but, absolutely no lighting smoke bombs indoors at my birthday party.
oh my god. separately texting an Allie and an Ally while drunk is hard, and I'm climbed 1/2 way up a bridge pier.
Every time he asks me if I'm horny I'm just like come on...stupid question
Things are very odd on my 29th hour of being awake. Thought there was a bird in my lecture hall and it was just a girl putting up her hair. What even
You told me I couldn't make out with you until I added you on LinkedIn
I didn't know. I guess I really haven't had that much time for drinking lately. I mean, outside drinking at home/work.
I was standing in my mom's kitchen in only my neon green thong, eating pizza over the garbage can, and sobbing while he was yelling at me.
He knows whenever I get drunk I'm going to call him and make fun of his major. Its like a reverse booty call.
I'm really sorry I bit your mom last night, it was completely uncalled for.
He has a penis. Therefore, he counts.
Alone, in the dark, eating tacos and drinking vodka. Who's apartment is this?
Randomize
