He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
It's not true, it's not true! She's too full of cheese to have sexy time!
It's impossible to flirt with the bank tellers because they see how broke I am.
FYI, when you wake up, please note that I puked in your shoes because I sstubbed my tooee, not becus I was drunk.
He's 11. You dont draw dicks on 11 year olds, i dont care if he ate your lasagna
Haha I will however wear glass and and draw a lightning bolt scar if you want to have sex that way, and that can be the only time you can call me Harry.
Your wedding's just one more day in my life I can't wear sweat pants.
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
Nah. And this is true. It's like you were trained by sexual Jedi or something.
*jedi wave* this is the penis you were looking for
I was weirded out when the chunky goth girl and her boyfriend both started eyeing me and wanted to by me a drink.
I'm watching Part of Your World now and I'm crying and I feel like I'm floating right along with her. This. This right here is some drunken Disney Magic
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
Lots of tissues. Maybe pizza. Only time will tell. The stages of political grief.
My roommate just woke up to me masturbating in our room. I figured this would happen eventually.
Randomize
