So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
Reach down the front of your pants and feel around for a while. When you find your balls, leave the library and meet me at the bar.
You know i think she's just using me for sex
I hate you.
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Toga everclear = hospital visit... Im sure the paramedics hate me right now
we started pounding beers an hour ago to celebrate our personal snow day tomorrow. vodka shots for u of i's actual decision are on standby.
We defiantly won best dressed in the ER tonight
No The bastards made me buy a new one, They don't cover water damage an apparently they consider salsa water damage
I had to rip your toilet paper for you...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please tell me you have Advil or Tylenol or ibuprofen or a fucking baseball bat
You pulled out a fucking recorder and started playing along with all the songs on your playlist and refused to hit the j
At one point we were both in the bathroom and i was taking a shit while holding your hair as you puked in the sink. Friendship.
...I watched him run on the beach yesterday and I think I started ovulating
I saw a picture of a baby and it reminded me to take my birth control. Priorities
Ugh hungover at a laundromat is a terrible feeling. For some reason I keep getting sucked into staring at the clothes spinning around and around and it makes me want to profusely projectile vomit everywhere
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