I'm peeing chunks and puking liquid. Did I at least have fun last night?
eh.. i should've known it was headed downhill after he used the phrase "pussy sundae"
I wish my mouth had a period so that could be my excuse on those days I don't feel like giving head
Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
The only thing that would make my night better is if William Shatner came and read me a bedtime story.
im covered in puffy paint and glitter i cant find kevin and im wearing shoes that dont belong to me....come get me please
HOLY SHIT HE'S TRYING TO EAT HIS FOOT. THIS IS THE BEST DAY OF MY LIFE.
I'm drunk at McDonald's in a fairy costume at 10 am nearly two weeks after Halloween. I don't think the Ohio State fans get it.
People were drinking out of 26ers with straws, and somewhere someone yelled "fill me with dicks!" I'm home.
I just had to take a picture of someone whose testicles are bigger than my fists combined. Living the dream.
Had to lock my cat in the bathroom so I could masturbate in peace.
I never knew it was coming. He was cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, and then BAM! Best hookup ever.
btw...it's noon and i'm sitting here drinking wine and eating pixie stix. I really need to find something to do...
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
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